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>View discussions about this entry Country: Australia
Organization: Mates Mens Support Group Bsn Inc
Focus of activity: Community Involvement
Year the initiative began: 2003
Positioning in the Mosaic of solutions
Description of Initiative: Mates Mens Support Group facilitates a 20 week Anger Management Course which focuses on men taking responibility for their actions, in doing so becoming suitible role models for their children which in turn teaches and models appropriate behaviour, thus helping to break the intergenerational cycle of Domestic Violence. We work with men (but also run a youth version) on taking responsibility for their thoughts, feelings and actions, whilst redefining their idendity and roles as men in the community. Mates has set up, A cooling off house (for the purpose of timeout), Two resource centres, Our own 24 hour phone line, Counseling service and job network, as well as an up to date data-base for referrals. In setting this very supportive network up we have addressed most of the excuses men use to support their denial or to justify their actions. The purpose of this is to remove all the excuses, which in turn forces men to realize that the only person they can blame for their actions is themselves and to take ownership of their actions and consequenses. We focus on two principles, the first being 'You alone are responsible for your anger, no one else and You can only change yourself not others. The Course also incorperates relationship and communication skills. The cooling Off House means that they can call time-out and not have to worry anout food, clothes etc and come to us and get help and support bfore returning home to their partners. They don't get drugs and alcohol. This has been a huge success with no relapses stemming from their use of time-out. The other part of the 24 hour support is our own crises phone line. By calling us when in crises, they are talking to their facilitator, somone they already have a rapport with and not a stranger, 9 out of 10 times we have been able to help him over the phone and remind him why he is striving for a non-abusive lifestyle. Theprimary benificiraries are the men them selves as they become better persons, so everyone benifits.
Innovation: Mates was founded by myself (an ex-perpetrator) and the first need I addressed was that of access. Having been there I knew how futile it was getting support from an agency that kept office hours and how frustrating it was when I needed help and reached out I ended up with a recorded message or having to talk to a complete stranger in another State. Mates was the first group in Australia to offer a 24 hour personal support network to men in need at this level.
The Cooling Off House was also an Australian inititive in the fact that Mates gave The Police 24 hour access to it and encouraged officers to remove the male from the house during a domestic and bring him to us. This took the man out of his comfort zone which helped him to think abuot his actions and left the women and children safe. The police would impose bail conditions stopping him from returning home for 12 hours up to 72 hours depending on the circumstances. We house and feed him for this period and use the time to build a rapport and work with him on his anger and stress issues. It is not a prison and he is free to come and go, but we will advise the Police every time he leaves our care. This helps him realize their are consequences in place shoud he break the police orders. To date there has not been one breach of police orders or restraining orders from anyone going through the house. Mates does all its own fund-raising which is hard work , but gets us into the community and shows people the positive side to a very dark subject. By being active in the community we have got people talking about domestic violence rather than ignoring it or sweeping it under the carpet. This has helped a lot of men to get help as well as give a lot of victims the oppertunity to get advice, information and help. Close to 70% of people cotacting Mates are victims seeking help and advice. Delivery Model: Mates does all its own fund-raising. We use the Media to our advavtage and put a positive spin on every thing we do. As President I do a lot of public speaking and address other groups to encourage networking.
We make ourselves very approachable and are very active within the community. This includes activities like having a festval queen entrant to being at shows with the dunking macine we built. We do regular bab-b-ques and walk through all the pus and clubs talking to people. This type of approach has been very successsful in that it has shown the community that as men we are not looking for handouts but are prepared to get out there and work in order to reach our desired outcomes. This has earnt Mates the respect and admiration of all who come in contact with us which is higlighted in the fact that Mates has won several major awards in the first three years of operation. We have approached all agencies surrounding abuse both Government and non-Government and work closely with them to target abuse. We measure the impact of this by the amount of men doing our course and the number of victims seeking help. Key Operational Partnerships: We have built up partnerships with the West Australian Police Force, Shire Council, Community Justice Service, Department of Community Development, Rotary and other service providers in the area.
The Police has been our biggest and most effective partnership and this is indicated by our work at the Cooling off House. As well as this Mates has equipped all Police cars in the district with information packs, so that when they attend a domestic they can leave an information pack which as information for both the victim and perpetrator of where to get help. Working with the Community Liasion Officer we produced a brochour on the different levels of domestic violence, the harm they cause and where they can get help as a victim or perpetraor. Financial Model: Most of our services are free to the community.
We ask for a $10 dollar donation for the Anger Management Course but attendence is not subject to paying this. We would rather someone turns up than not come because they don't have $10. The Cooling Off House is free to use for those enrolled in the course and the Police Stations that use it's services. Food for the house is donated by local service agencies. Apart from that we fundraise for all funds needed with the help of a couple of small Govt grants. We set Mates up to mostly self-sufficient and have a lot of fund-raising inititives like the dunking machine which we hire out to other groups. The problem with funding grants is that you always more and soon the service becomes reliant on the funding and should it stop the service stops. We are very passionate about helping men adjust to meet the norms of today's society that we maintain our own fundraising as a way to stay sustainable but also as a way of keeping in touch with the community.
Effectiveness: Since October 2003 Mates has had over 300 men access the Anger Management Course (20 week program) with over two thousand taking advantage of our other services such as cooling off house or resource centers.
The biggest impact to date would be how we have people talking about the group and becoming aware of the different forms of domestic violence. Thinking about the hareful effects of verbal, social and economic abuse to name a few rather than just thinking physical was the only form of abuse. Helping men realise that their children are learning their inappropriate behaviours and the effect they are having on their lives. How many people have benifitted? it's immeasurable. When we help a man to lead a non-abusive lifestyle everyone benifits, from partners, kids through to workmates and other motorists on the roads. We teach them to use the techniques in all aspects of life. You can't be nice at home and a danger to every one else or you can't be mister nice guy at work and a tyrant at home. We have helped local Police Stations change how they deal with domestic incidents and have given them an avenue or chance to be able to help people they deal with and maybe stop re-offending.
Scaling up Strategy: Mates is very careful not to get to big to fast. At present we are fine tuning the services we offer and looking at ways of maintaining the quality of our services.
Over the next 3 years we hope to help set up more Mates groups in other towns all over Australia especially in rural and remote towns where services are limited. I have been careful to set our policies and procedures up as a service group aimed at helping men and not a political advocacy. We are here for support and not to jump on to soapboxes. This is the way we will set the guidelines for new groups and will train other leaders to follow this protocol. Mates is about taking ownership of your self and working on bettering yourself.
Origin of the Initiative: Prior to set up in October 2003 I was a perpetrator caught up in the cycle of domestic violence. I did an Anger Management Course close to the one we run, but with very minimal support.
From then i have never looked back , I adopted a non-abusive lifestyle and found my new found knowledge triggered a self awareness bug and I started to explore . I started doing Anger Management classes out of my lounge to keep everything fresh in my mind and soon found out there was a huge need in the town where I was living. I set up Mates and added a large support network to the course. Since setting up Mates I have furthered my training and now hold a diploma in Counseling. I lead my life as an example to all other men and am a great role model for my children especially my six year old son. Mates is a lifestyle not a job and I am seeing the benifits every day to the work I am doing. Main Obstacles to Scaling Up: Firstly is finding the right people. As stated before all our members are selected from people who have done our course and are showing they are leading a non-abusive lifestyle. Walk the walk and talk the talk.
No hidden agendas. Secondly is taking stock not to get to big to fast and having to reduce the level and quality of what we offer as a result. Both of these obstacles are entwined as we need one to stop the other. There is alot of people that want to help but in one way or another are still in denial with their own anger so we have to be very careful so that someone in crisis gets the right help and support. Main Partnership Challenges: We don't have any major problems with partnerships as long as it's for the benifit of those we are trying to help. We will not align ourselves with groups or agencies with radical or militant views as it is not what we are about.
At Mates we believe in the strengths of partnerships and the power of networking and both implement and encourage as many partnerships as possible to help reduce abuse. We work very closely with local Women's Refuges and do joint projects and informtion swapping on protocols. We have just gained acredibility with Government Departments who have watched our growth very closely, and this has been helped with my recent graduation and diploma in Counseling. Contact Information:
Robert Reekie
President Mates Mens Support Group Bsn Inc (Not for Profit - Community) easymates2004@yahoo.com Po Box 176 BUSSELTON 6280 , WA Australia Australia Tel: Australia (08) 97523217 Fax: Australia (08) 97514632 Website: n/a Discussions about this entry |
M.O.V.E (Men Overcoming Violence For Equality)
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Wow! I hope Wyoming DVSA Programs read this one!